‘Son Of The Morning’ by Driftwood Brewery


This might be the most brutal label of all time, it’s like a hardcore metal album cover!


May contain traces of Satan.

The people behind the designs of Driftwood’s labels are seriously talented and you should check them out at Hired Guns Creative. I’m pretty sure they aren’t actually an assassination organization that prides itself on killing people in wild an wacky ways. Although, being that blatant about it might be the best way to get away with it. The ol’ hiding in plain sight stratagem!


I'm not even wearing a suit!

I visited the Driftwood Brewing stand at the Coquitlam Craft Beer festival recently, which was wildly popular with the neckbeards. There were so many neckbeards and curly mustaches about, it felt like I was in an ironic, flannel, western flick. I love Driftwood. I do. I just have a tendency to gravitate away from whatever is really popular, and Driftwood is really popular (for good reasons). I scooted up to the booth and got out as fast as I could, I just wanted to try their new something-weisse and GTFO.

I hate one thing about these festivals. The stupid asshole fucking people. I mean, people already piss me off by sucking at everything, but these festivals really highlight a few major general stupidities of humanity that make me want to hire some creative guns (eh?!).


You suck at living, period.

These booths are small and the festivals are packed, so there tends to be messy ‘lines’ (anamorphus blobs) at the more popular booths. I can deal with that. I lived through high school. Until you inevitably get that one fat dingus that gets his sample and just fucking stands there. In the way. I want a sample too fuckface! Move your skinny jeans, beer-gut, black-frame-glasses havin’ ass out of the way, you inconsiderate prick. I had to pass my glass over a few of these static-whales shoulders, which elicited a few glares. I don’t understand that mentality. Yeah, I shmooshed with some of the representatives too, when I wasn’t clearly in the way. Am I the only one that’s aware of my surroundings? Because it really seems that way sometimes. It’s like those wonderful jokers that don’t use their signals on the road. Blatant ignorance.


No turn signal... Fucker.

The pour is a crystal clear golden amber with about two fingers of pure white turbulent froth.

The smells are pungent, in almost a sour way. Apricot, sour grapes, passion fruit, and crackers. Powerful and enticing.

The tastes are apricots, mangos, tonic, alcohol, fresh wheat, wine tannins, green grapes and a touch of odd spice. It’s not particularly hoppy, more sweet and fruity. The alcohol is very noticeable but seems to work well here.

The mouthfeel is really smooth, surprisingly. It’s medium bodied with a decent amount of carbonation going on. Flavors hit dead center of the tongue and roll out sideways.

3.5/5 I didn’t expect to enjoy this as much as I did, mostly because of the high alcohol content. This is why I will try anything at least once. It’s not my favorite of their brews, but worth trying at least once.


My face when.


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