‘Salty Scot’ Sea Salted Scotch Ale by Parallel 49 Brewing Co


Aye laddie! Me Mah an Pah got me thas fer Christmas tyme, sa I figgir I be reviewin’ it fer ye. This review will be completely illegible if I keep that up, so I won’t.


GREASE ME UP WOMAN!... Okie dokie.

I wasn’t sure if I’d ever had a Scottish Ale before, so after a quick Google I’ve determined that yes, I have. The most notable would be the highly overrated ‘Innis & Gunn’ Oak Barrel something-or-other. Innis fucking sucks, and I don’t give a corny turd nugget who says otherwise. Innis is stale, uninspired crap drank by people that THINK they know what a good beer is. I assure you, I won’t let the nightmarish memories of the befouled, perfume-pruno mar my review of this in any way. I will simply forget Innis exists and be better for it. I’ve taken off my mask, now let’s see if you can take off yours.


I'm glad you're dead! HAH-HAHAHA!

I always enjoy the cartoonish artwork on Parallel 49s labels, it somewhat reminiscent of the ‘Garbage Pail Kids’ to me. Minus the grossness.


Also known as 'Meth Matty' or 'Maple Ridge Marty'.


The pour is a clear dark amber with aboot a halfa finger of light tan, puffy foam. It slowly ebbed to a nice full haze. Has a good deal of fine lacing going on. A handsome brew!

The smells are toffee, toasted nuts, wine barrel and some odd fruits I can’t seem to decipher.. Something like figs but not. It’s peculiar, I don’t love it.

The tastes are salty caramel (outta left field, clearly), walnuts, prunes, sweet red berries, figs(?), and some mild earthy backdrop. The salt is too much, this is a pretty powerful flavor scheme, a la ‘wee heavy’.

The mouthfeel is medium bodied with decent carbonation. It’s a little sticky right in the middle of the tongue. Flavors seem to pop big in the back edges of the mouth. Not a pounder. It be a sipper laddie!

3/5 It’s pretty good but the saltiness didn’t work that well for me. It’s worth a shot, especially if you love ‘wee heavy’ styles, or you are a saltwater mammal of some type that’s looking for a beer reminiscent of home.


Salty like the tears of my enemies.


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