Smoked Porter by Stone Brewing Co


“Eeeeverybody must get stone(d)!”


Gargoyle approves this statement.

*I know it’s a Bob Dylan lyric, and this is Keith Richards. I know that. Fuckin relax*

This is the first play from scrimmage for Stone Brewing in my playbook. It’s not widely available here, it’s mostly available in the niche beer stores (Firefly!). It’s bloody cold outside, and I wanted a good, heavy, by-the-fireplace type beer. That was the full extent of my reasoning.


Hat and boots, let's roll!

The label is kind of cool, and fired on which is a nice touch. Something about the fired on labels just seems more professional to me. Maybe it’s because I work with kilns and glassware. There’s probably an underlying bias. Can’t go wrong with Keith Richards on the label… HAHAHAAA!


Because he looks like a gargoyle! GET IT?! You don't get it.

It pours as dark as blackest nights, with some faint blood red around the edges. Has a good finger of light brown foam, wondrous lacing, a thin perfect layer of tiny bubbles that’s like a sexy, tasty shower curtain. If a shower curtain can ever be considered sexy…. It’s a beer thing. And possibly a bondage thing.


James Bondage. Whipped, not stirred.

The smells are light smoke, blackberry and dark chocolate, simple and effective. Really nice.

The tastes are light smoke, strong dark chocolate, unidentifiable berries (raisin, and maybe blueberries) and a hint of candy sweetness. Fuckin TASTY buddy! Good malt-end porter that drinks like a meal, not a sessionable brew and that’s what I expect from the heavy end of the beer spectrum.

Mouthfeel is punchy and not too heavy, smooth and delectable. Flavors hit hard and wane effectively. Light carbonation. Delightful.

4.5/5 Excellent! My first crack at Stone is wonderful, now I must try the rest of the catalogue. It’s a hard knock life.


My creepy face when


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