‘Vulcan Ale’ by Harvest Moon Brewing

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Captains log: Stardate 47634.44. Warf farted in the holodeck again. Goddamn Klingons. Asshole only eats meat too, we had to evacuate and quarantine the area. Even Odo was complaining, and he doesn’t have to breathe. Ever smell the fart of a Klingon on a high-protein diet? It’s an actual biohazard.

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Our gods are dead. Ancient Klingon warriors slew them a millennia ago. They were more trouble than they were worth.

I’ll be honest here. I am expecting a shitty gimmick beer. Why? Just a hunch I guess. I am not a Star Trek or Star Wars nerd (although Star Trek is vastly superior in every single possible way), but I do have love for pretty much all things ‘nerdy’, so I picked this up. At 3 bucks it’s not going to hurt my feeling (yes, singular) if I have to sacrifice this to the garbarater.

“Live long and go fuck yourself.” – Spock, maybe.

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Emotionless my ass.

It pours a dark cedar, with a half finger of fizzy tan head that quickly settled to a nearly negligible hazing. Not much lacing going on, and a tiny collar.

The smells are damp wheat, grain and grass. Some faint roasted dark malt, with a nutty complexion. This beer has complexity? Dafuq?

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He looks like an alien Eddie Murphy from Delirious.

The taste is actually not bad. Sweet rolls, taffy, molasses and brown sugar, a sweet beer overall. Has a tiny hop bite, reminiscent of European type hops. Kind of like exotic spice, kind of hard to describe. This beer reminds of a ‘bitter’ or maybe even a tamer ESB.

The mouthfeel is crisp and bubbly, and the flavor fades quickly. Probably a sessionable beer. Nerds can safely grab this and not wretch.

3/5 I expected far worse, this is decent. Not blowing me away or anything.

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Sir. I recommend making it rain on these bitches!

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